Typical conversation with Tristan while in the car...

T: "Mama, can you count for three years?'

me: "Probably."

T: "How much would it be?"

me: "No idea"

T: "Mama, if you are still counting after three years, would you be out of breath?"
pause 3 seconds "What does out of breath mean?"

me: "Probably. And it means that you need some more breath."

T: "Ok, so if you are out of breath and count for three years, would you throw up?"

me: "Probably"

T: "Cooooooolllllll"

TEMSK

Yes, it's that time again - Things Every Mom Should Know!
OK, here's today's tip: Find out specifics for objects (example: "It has to start with the letter G, Mommy!")for Show and Tell before it's time to leave for school. Don't just assume that you can grab a cool object while running out the door. Otherwise, mass chaos and much dumping of toy bins will ensue. Do you know how hard it is to find a toy that starts with the letter G?

Cade

Man, I LOVE this picture.

Me and haircutting

I am not to be trusted with hair clippers. You know, the kind that make lots of noise and can shave a head bald. Yeah, ummm, I have tried to cut hair twice with them. Once I ended up accidentally shaving a bald spot on the back of Tanner's head, and ended up with a nearly bald Boo-boo. The other day, I was going to get after Tristan's head of hair, which is a daunting task. Dude has some HAIR. So anyway, 30 minutes, lots of screaming (from both of us) and a lot of tears later, Tristan is bald. Buzzed. Looks like a marine. I pressed too hard and cut a bald spot on the top of his head. Cade, my wise child, has informed me that I am never cutting his hair - EVER.

Tristan hilarity

Mama, if Noggin is preschool on tv, why can't I just stay home and watch it?
************************************************************************
(After eating the evil Nerds) Mama! My spit is purple!
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Mama, when I watch Teletubbies, I don't want Cade to know.
************************************************************************
Me: Tristan, what is your favorite thing about school"
T: Lunch
Me: What's your least favorite thing?
T: Lunch
Me: *sigh* I had to ask...
***********************************************************************
Mama, look! I drew Daddy with a potato head!
***********************************************************************
Mama, what happens to birds when the wind blows?

TEMSK

Don't buy little children Nerds candy. Made the mistake. Still finding little pink and purple ball looking things all over the house and car. Found one in Tristan's hair. It's like freaking fleas. They just keep multiplying.

Cade and Tristan

Just a simple reminder...

Be kind.
Be kind to others, even those who don't deserve it, and be kind to yourself as well.
The world needs a little more compassion and a little less selfishness.
Ask yourself - have you done anything kind for someone today?

Grumpaloopacus

Look at that handsome boy!

TEMSK Number 6

Time for another installment of THINGS EVERY MOTHER SHOULD KNOW.

Invest in Dum-dum suckers. They are miracles on a stick.

Example: Tristan went to the dr yesterday. He got 5 shots (which he fought like a little lion - dude is strong) I, of course, forgot to put Dum-dums in my purse, but I also didn't know he had to have 5 shots to start preschool. Anyway, cried himself to sleep on the way home. Got home - very unhappy Tristan. Unhappy Tristan is terrible. Really, really terrible. So I asked him if he wanted some dum-dums. He wanted 12. He got 12 (hey, don't judge, 5 shots are painful). He spent the next hour and a half happily eating the miracles on sticks quietly and watching cartoons. Peace and harmony restored.

Take my advice. Keep yourself sane and kids happy. Buy Dum-dums.

Warning - Angry Woman Ahead

This is going to sound like it's coming out of left field, but it's my main thoughts today, so I thought I'd share.
I think that having to worry about what other people think is a stress that is unnecessary. Maybe I've been hanging out with Bryant too long ( he has never cared one whit what people think), but recent events have convinced me that appearances are shallow. And those who judge them are a waste of freaking time.
I am so glad that I no longer live in a place where I have to worry about wearing makeup and nice clothes just to pick up my child from school. Not that I ever let it bother me much - I'm not that way and never have been - I think it's ridiculous to even think that people will look at what I have on while waiting for my kid to come out of the school. However, the sad fact remains that there are folks out there who will comment on your hair, makeup, outfit, whatever...while you do the most mundane of chores. I am not, nor will I ever, totally remake my face and change into a cute outfit just simply to run to the school or Walmart. I don't care to be around those who feel that if you don't live in a certain neighborhood, you just aren't good enough to be friends.
Furthermore, while I'm on the subject of judging, I am sick to death of the judgmental attitudes of those who know nothing about me and my family, have not seen me or my children in years and still feel it necessary to pass opinions on me which have no basis - like saying I want a glamorous lifestyle, I sit on my butt all day, or that I demand a certain way of life. Ummm, yeah, I'm raising three boys by myself while my husband works his rear end off 1,900 miles away to pull us out of a hole, I DO NOT wear designer clothes despite ignorant comments to the contrary, and I drive a 5 year old Suburban with a HOLE IN THE FLOORBOARD. I work my rear off every single day, 7 days a week, no breaks, to be mama and daddy to my boys and make sure they are happy and healthy, and have everything they want and need. I fall into bed most nights (late, btw) with my body aching from being so freaking tired. I barely have time to take a shower much less lay on the couch and eat bonbons and watch the soaps (which i HATE, btw). Yeah, real, real glam, so extravagant. Elizabeth Taylor and all that. Oh yeah, baby.
And if the person reading this gets the Elizabeth Taylor reference and a few other phrases, I'm letting you know - YOU SUCK. Bryant and I - we are soooooo over you. Now take your toys and go play somewhere else.
To everyone else, take a look at your lives (me included - I am as guilty as anyone) and make sure that you aren't passing judgment on someone. It's not your right and it's just not nice.

Thoughts for the day

Ok, let's ponder this today. Why is it that a 4 year old will ask a question that is impossible to answer in the car - i.e. how many seconds is three thousand years? And after asking the question two or three times, why is it that getting an "I don't know" only prompts the 4 year old to ask the question louder and louder for the next 20 minutes? Nonstop. I mean, seriously.

TEMSK

OK, I'm just full of these lately. Here goes today's #5 installment:

When your child comes to your bedside in the wee hours of the morning saying his tummy hurts, do NOT give red Gatorade to settle the stomach (albeit in a fog of interrupted sleep) because said child will come back 15 minutes later and throw up the Gatorade all over the floor by your bedside leaving a wonderful pink stain that will require professional steam cleaning ( I scrubbed that darn thing for half an hour and it won't come out).

Daddy and Boo-boo

Numbers 3 and 4

OK, here's another installment of Things Every Mom Should Know (i.e. learn from my mistakes):

#3 - always take a portable dvd player on car trips longer than 30 minutes (or in my case, every time you get in the car). That is, if you are like me and don't have one already in the car. Yes, I am a loser.

#4 - when taking said dvd player, make sure that you have the charger and the car adapter so that when the dvd player stops at their favorite part of Spongebob, you don't have to hear your 8 year old whine and gripe, the 4 year old cry with his mouth wide open, and the 2 year old weep tears of actual sadness because Spongebob went away. For two hours.

Tenth Anniversary

Today is our 10th anniversary! I'm thinking that this milestone represents so much - a new start, doing it right, taking God's path, getting ready for the rest of our lives together. We have three gorgeous boys, and I look forward to sitting with him years from now while the grandkids climb all over us. Cool, huh?

Cute kid

T.E.M.S.K.

Things Every Mom Should Know #2

If your child is acting 10 times more squirrelly than normal, check for fever BEFORE deciding on a military preschool.

Things every mom should know...

I think I'll start doing a post like this every now and then and compile them into one big list.

Anyway, here's today's tidbit...

You know it's time for school to start when you catch your kids in the pantry putting food coloring in the water bottles.

HAPPY

Conversing with Daddy

10 Things to Improve

OK, I've been thinking lately about how I can "be better", particularly a better mom. So, here's a list of things that I have come up with to improve myself and my outlook

1. Spend more quality time with each kid

2. Read to them more often

3. Have more patience (this will be the hardest one, no doubt)

4. Get up earlier in the morning

5. Be a better "picker-upper" around the house. Clutter makes us all crazy.

6. Cook more for the kids

7. Fret less, do more

8. Eat chocolate when I feel like it, just not too much

9. Pray more and harder

10. Start going to church again

Another b-day pic

I love this picture. It's Cade's reaction to seeing the guitar we got him for his birthday.

Big Number 8!

That is one happy 8 year old dude!

July 21

Cade is 8 today. He actually looks bigger. I think he grew last night. He is such a funny kid - right on that line of being a big kid who is interested in Guitar Hero, fast cars, and watching movies with cuss words ( he is obsessed with getting me to let him watch PG movies) and being a little kid who still needs Mommy to kiss his ouchies and sleeps with his stuffed dog. I also thought this was somewhat ironic -he asked me last night , all big innocent blue eyes, "Mom, what is sex?" I paused for a moment and took the chicken way out and said, "That's a discussion for you and your daddy." Way to hand off the ball! Bryant was totally not ready to have the conversation and outside of "where did you hear that" he said that it was something that adults talk about and he and Cade would discuss it when he was older. WTG, Dad. So the question is - do you tell a young kid what it is or do you stall? Where is that line? I'm sure there are arguments for both sides. But anyway, happy birthday to my oldest boy - where has the time gone??

It's hard to be 4

It's hard to be 4. It's hard to be the parent of someone who is 4. Tristan is on that line of wanting to do all the big things that Cade does, but he still feels a pull towards the toddler geared things that interest Tanner, too. He gets told NO a lot. He gets reprimanded A LOT. His daddy working in Montana and only coming home once a month isn't helping matters. And Tristan - well, he is not one to show emotion. He is the most private little child I have ever seen, unlike Cade who wears his gentle heart on his sleeve. I worry about him - I think his feelings and emotions and thoughts are actually pretty complicated and he will struggle with that. It's my job to help him successfully navigate through all of these emotions and situations. Heady stuff.
That doesn't mean that he doesn't throw tantrums - he is a master screamer. He also has dead aim and isn't afraid to use it. If we can channel that intensity and aggression just right, he will be a truly successful, driven individual (possibly a major league pitcher based on the speed and accuracy with which Hotwheels cars have been hummed around here) who takes no crap. Dang it, there needs to be an instruction manual for this with a troubleshooting chapter or two. Or ten.

Excuse me while I vent...

OK, so. Summer colds suck. Hugely. Tristan, Tanner and I all have them. It's just ten kinds of wrong to get a cold in the summer and not the winter. So here we are - coughing, sneezing, sore throats, somewhat miserable. And there is no air conditioning upstairs. And it is HOT. HOT as in, can't breathe, humid, muggy, nasty hot. (I really don't like summers in Houston.) The a/c has been out since Saturday night and the whole freaking unit is going to have to be replaced, and if the a/c people don't get out here and get it done, I'm going to lose my freaking mind. Tristan and Tanner are sleeping with me and every cough, sneeze, and sniff wakes me up. This is not a funny post, or a good story. It is simply me griping because it should be illegal to have to go without a/c for more than an hour or so in the summertime. At least we have air downstairs.

Brotherly Love

This is going to be quick because it's late and I'm tired. Today Tanner stood on a chair and it fell with him on it, smashing his finger. Pretty sure it's broken, spoke to our good friend who's an orthopedist who said he will be ok, we'll see him on Monday, call him if it gets worse. The real story here is how his brothers reacted. Cade was at Vacation Bible School, and Tristan was here. Tristan showed a side we rarely see. He kept bringing bandaids, food, toys, etc to Tanner as he screamed hysterically. Tristan would pat him and say, "It's ok, Boo-boo" and his big blue eyes looked so sad at the sight of his brother in pain. When we picked up Cade and told him about it, he dropped everything to look at Tanner's hand and ask him if he was ok and was just so sweet and solicitous of his baby brother. See, the moral of the story here is that there is hope. Hope that one day, they will be best of friends. I need to re-read this entry on a day that they have done nothing but scream, fight, and name-call all the live long day. Umm, that will be tomorrow, I fear.

Wishful Thinking

OK, it's just sad and depressing when your own child tells you the house is too messy. We moved in about a month and a half ago and there are still boxes and crap EVERYWHERE. Ugh. And I'm not a great housekeeper. I need a maid. Seriously, if I win the lottery, I am SO getting a housekeeper.

I suck

I know, I am sucking lately at blogging. But hey, I have good excuses. My husband is working in Montana, we moved, I got strep throat, a raging sinus infection, threw my back out, got an abscess in a tooth that required emergency oral surgery (and let me tell you, every Mom should have some percoset on hand. Good Lord!). And all of that since about mid-May. Not to mention dealing with the hellions, ahem, I mean, BOYS by myself. So. More to come soon.

Tristan age 4

Joy

Things I said I'd Never Do

After talking to my friend and college roommate, Stacey, yesterday and mentioning that my kids love Spongebob even though I swore I'd never let my kids watch it, I decided to make a list of the things I swore I'd never, ever do.

1. Let my kids watch Barney. When Cade was a baby, I tried my best to get him to watch Barney, Teletubbies, ANYTHING just to get 10 minutes for SOMETHING. Broke that resolution real quick.

2. Let them eat candy - like that was not going to happen or something

3. Play in the street - to my defense, we DO live in a cul de sac

4. Let them play video games - Thank HEAVENS for Playstation - it gives me a chance to fix dinner.

5. Yell at my kids - Ummmm, yeah. I'm a bad mom.

6. Bribe them. "Tristan, if you will PLEASE give Boo-Boo that toy, I will give you a dollar." Works every time. Tristan and Cade have quite the stash.

7. Spoil them - see #6

8. Ignore them - I have learned a little benign neglect never hurt anyone. Makes them more independent. Yeah, that's right.

9. I swore I'd never, ever, EVER let my kids fight - they would be best buddies. Delusional, that's all I have to say.

10. I would never give birth without an epidural. OK, so Tristan's didn't take because the guy didn't do it correctly and there wasn't time with Tanner. Cade was the only one that went as planned. Figures.

Just to note - as I've been typing this list off the top of my head, my two younger ones have been running around without pants, jumping off the stairs into their little chairs (yes, I can see them) and screaming with joy. Only one mishap when Tristan jumped and missed. No blood. No bruises. He's all good.

It's SPONGEBOB!!

For my sweet friend Stacey.

Remember the things that we said we'd NEVER do...

Hee!!!

Typical Tanner :)

My Tristan

He turned 4 yesterday.

The beginning...

OK. So. Yesterday, Tristan put noodles in the fish tank at school.
As I was apologizing profusely to the teacher, I glanced at Tristan who grinned at me.

He's been in school a month. This is his first incident. I'm surprised it took this long.

Idealism

Today Cade said to me, "Mama, one day I might change the world."

You just might, kiddo.

Trumped by a Stuffed Animal

I can't get Tanner to tell me he loves me to save my life. I've begged, pleaded, bribed, tried to get him to mimic me, etc. I have resigned myself to the fact that he will not utter that phrase. Today when I picked him up after his nap and handed him his beloved teddy bear, Doggy Bear-Bear, he nuzzled it and said, plain as day, "I love you, DOGGY BEAR-BEAR."

The Eyes DON'T Have It

OK, I know this isn't the last time something similar will happen, but when my kid gets in the car in tears because someone made fun of him at school, my heart shatters into about a zillion pieces. Then I want to smack the kid and the kid's parents for making a child who would hurt my boy. So anyway, Cade got into the car on Friday and immediately slumped down, "I had a bad day," and he was on the verge of crying. And it was MY fault!!! See, the kids had to make a cowboy, so I helped Cade, and we made the hat pulled low over the face so that only a smile showed. We thought it was really cool, kinda different. Cade was excited to take it to school and show everyone. Well, some mean little punks made fun of his cowboy because it didn't have eyes. Things like that are evidently very important in first grade. Note to self: faces must be discernible. The teacher must've caught wind of this because she asked Cade if he wanted to make some eyes, and he said no. HE SAID NO!! Because HE liked it the way it was!! So even though his feelings were hurt and kids were making fun of his creation, he refused to change it because HE liked it. He. Did. Not. Cave. I'm so proud of my kid. Still heartbroken because he had his little feelings tromped on, but I'm PROUD of Cade for standing his ground. Take THAT, little punks who made fun of MY boy.

The first of many mishaps, I'm sure...

Yesterday Tristan flooded my bathroom.

I walked into my bathroom to run water in the tub for Tristan and Tanner. As soon as I rounded the corner, I knew something wasn't right?


"What in the world?!? What...where? TRISTAN!!!!"

He had turned on the faucet and plugged the sink.

According to my mom, Tristan ran behind the bed and cowered, whispering, "I didn't mean to, Mommaw," while I frantically threw all the towels in the linen cabinet on the floor and called neighbors in search of a wet/dry vac.

Speaking of my mom, she came to the doorway a few times and snickered at me. I think she thoroughly enjoyed this whole scene.

Later as I was giving the kids a bath, Tristan very hesitantly asked me, "Are you mad, Mommy?"

"Yes, I am, as a matter of fact," said in a VERY curt tone.

Big blue eyes clouded with uncertainty, he asked, "When will you not be mad anymore?"

"I don't know yet, Tristan."

Tiny voice, HUGE blue eyes, "Will you still be mad tomorrow?"

Sigh. "Probably not"

Sunshine returns to his eyes, mischevious little grin with a smidge of relief appears, "Ok, I can deal with that."

G.R.O.S.S.

Overheard:

Tristan: "Look, Daddy!! I can lick the dirty off my feet!"

Daddy: *hysterical laughter*

Hug me then GET OFF

Not even 4 years old and he won't let me hug him in public. He's barely tolerating this one. He even wipes my kisses off in his sleep.

Brothers

I'm sorry, but that's just flat funny.